Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
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