You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
Randomize
