I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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