Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
