I can't watch pbs sober anymore
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
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