Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
