Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
