Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
