Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
So vagazzling was a success
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
