i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize