had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
