He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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