I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
