Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
