dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize