I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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