He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
