You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
