There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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