Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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