she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
