hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
