oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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