I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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