...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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