areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
