Small penises have feelings too.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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