I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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