"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
well you can't waste a boner
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
