i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
