Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
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