I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Randomize
