Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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