plz talk dirty to me
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I have fence marks all over my body
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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