Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Ketchup is God's man juice
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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