I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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