it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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