I want to walk on stilts...naked
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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