idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize