Don't you send me to vm
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
either way he was missing a nipple.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
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