ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
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