I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
