I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
