then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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