You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Randomize
