Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
