It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
