Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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