Where did you get a picture of my penis
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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