im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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