12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
